Marriage is the institution where sex is supposed to be a regular thing but for the 20M Americans who are in sexless marriages it is not the case. When it comes to navigating marriage, when you know that something is not right you may beat yourself up thinking that others have it easy but sexless marriage is not happening to you alone if that is where you are. Even so, you need to decide on what to do. Marriage is not a roommate situation but rather the stage where you get to be intimate as frequently as possible. With a sexless marriage you have to remember that there are bound to be deeper issues and unless you confront them you won’t make any progress.
You don’t want to be missing out on the perks of having regular sex which is why you need to fix the problem as fast as possible. There are various strategies you can apply in rekindling intimacy in the marriage. Having a diary is very helpful when you want to rekindle the romance. This means there is a specific time when you will be having sex in the day. When everyone is aware of this, you will look forward to it. You are going to have great anticipation in this case and it will make it feel even more special.
Having sex regularly keeps you on the mood which is why your calendar should have this. Booking a hotel room out of town or going abroad can help bring back romance. You just have to leave the house for something new. Ensure it is the two of you spending quality time. Those who have children should get a babysitter and you should take a few days away from work. This means you will not be worried about the everyday pressures. When you are not worrying about kids or work, you can connect with your lover. It is also a peaceful environment. You need to communicate too. When there is good communication you can expect the relationship to be healthy. No one wants to be the person who points out the last time of having sex but this is necessary when you want to deal with the problem.
Do this outside the bedroom and discuss the matter fully. It should not be a blame game but rather an honest discussion without confrontations and you should really listen to what the other party is saying. What you think might be the issue might not be. Once those are fixed then comes intimacy. You do not have to stop talking about sex. Talking will lead to great improvements in your relationship. Another important factor for you to think about is therapy as a couple if need be.